When I was making my first steps… to success

The first thing that I did on this journey was starting a diary.

This is not the first record, but I guess it explains everything.

It is extremely difficult to begin. But I have to.

I’m afraid there is no other way. Maybe I’ll do it slowly first…

I have a feeling that it might be “the rock bottom”, even if it is not, it’s painful enough right now.

I certainly feel the lack, or rather absence of courage, to look inside of me, to find out what is happening, why and what to do.

The whole endeavour is so scary that I’m ready to throw away the notepad as far as possible and preferably with a big bang.

Why am I living in this mess?

What would be my first step out?

[…]

Claim everything back…

[…]

It does not matter if it will or will not be understood…

I cannot come to grips (check expression) with my life and I have to.

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In a Nutshell