Today is the last day of February and I don’t have time to say anything about love.  I was planning to write the whole essay.  Did not happen.

Love was promised to me in abundance for the year 2010.  Yep!  The year of the Tiger.  I read some astrological prognoses for a Scorpio.  Astrologers said it could not be any better for me as far as love goes.  It should turn my head and I should walk on air and rush about and float on the waves of love.

The year of Tiger began on February 14^th 2010.

It coincided with the St. Valentine’s Day.  Does that have any significance?  Probably not.  By the way, one of the horoscopes said that I would go on a wonderful date on St. Valentine’s Day.  I was on a date (amazingly enough!), but I wish I had have turned it down.  But maybe that was also meant to be.  The previous night was much better, when I went to a Salsa Night and danced the night away.  Maybe that can be counted as a wonderful event.  I had I a suspicion that I was almost asked out by my love (former!), but I missed his hint and we did not meet.  Maybe that is for the better as well.  Enough with the guesswork already, whatever will be, will be.

Will this year be full of love for me? No, really?  Some say, love is not enough.  Not enough for a marriage.  And they are right.  I was married, I should know better.

I shall come back to these promises next year and see.  And now, I simply continue living my life as is…

I love this word even though it seems to be somewhat an exaggeration for describing how I feel.  How can I be infatuated with the person I am infatuated with?  Well, I am talking about “my delicate friend” and I am trying to figure out what has happened, why it has happened and what to do.  He dismissed the word “infatuation” as totally wrong or inappropriate.

Well, according to the dictionary “to infatuate” means either make foolish or inspire with a foolish and unreasoning passion.  Frankly, I don’t really see how passion can be reasoning.  But the word infatuation expresses something extreme – extreme adoration, foolish love, or unreasoning fondness.

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Mikhail Lermontov

I am lonenly and sad

I’m lonely and sad, and in moments of bitterest pain

Have no one to look to, alas…

Desires!.. What use to desire without end, without gain,

While all the best years swiftly, fleetingly pass!

To love… Whom?.. If briefly, ’tis not worth the effort…

Fore’er?..

Vain longing, since love cannot last.

Look into your heart: joy and torment – all paltry, and there

Remains not a trace of the past.

The passions?.. Sweet ailment that reason will easily cure,

A cold word of logic arrest.

And life – what is life if you look round you coolly?-

A poor,

An empty and trivial jest!..

1840

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We did not analyze the word “infatuation”.  But we did talk about chemistry.  The one that exists in relationships.  According to the dictionary, “chemistry” is described as “qualities of personality in interaction”.  He did not seem to be too happy that every woman (or so it seems) asks for this elusive concept of chemistry.  He said, that he did not study chemistry.  Well, neither did I, not this chemistry anyways.  We talked about it jokingly and then agreed that we probably should take some lessons.

On my own, I played with some words.  Chemistry versus Physistry (the physistry I did study).  Law of Attraction.  Magnetism.  Hypnosis.  Chain Reaction.  Energy.  Inertia.  Inertia?  That inertia of thinking when you for some reason fall for a certain type.  It is a powerful thing.  The patterns.  But seriously, what is chemistry?

I did look it up on the Internet and the resource that I found is short and sweet and quite to the point.

I am not going to cut and paste, you can read it on your own, provided it still will be available at the moment when you check out the link.  If it won’t, let me know, I save it on my computer just in case.

http://astoundingdatingtips.com/blog/2008/10/08/how-chemistry-is-build-between-a-man-and-a-woman/

The love potion apparently consists of three ingredients:

1)      PEA – phenylethylamine (adrenaline-like neurochemicals) – fireworks, we see stars, walk on air, natural high

2)      Dopamine

3)      Norepinephrine (both chemical cousins of amphetamines, that stimulate production of adrenaline) – euphoria, energy, love sparks

The best part is this – the author calls “chemistry” infatuation.

No, maybe the best part is, that the author dismisses the word love.

“Love? No, just “chemistry” and infatuation!

Brief preview:

In one week I made one friend and a foe,  met new people on a regular basis, exercised my brain and practised my communication skills, verbal and oral.  I feel like in a school again — learning the rules of dating and polishing my famous strategy “How to get what I want.”  So, I will keep you posted.