Magic has power to experience and fathom things which are inaccessible to human reason. For magic is a great secret wisdom, just as reason is a great public folly. PARACELSUS

Both in thought and in feeling, even though time be real, to realise the unimportance of time is the gate of wisdom. BERTRAND RUSSELL

Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known. CARL SAGAN

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. JULES DE GAULTIER

The logic of worldly success rests on a fallacy: the strange error that our perfection depends on the thoughts and opinions and applause of other people!  A weird life it is, indeed, to be always in somebody else’s imagination, as if that were the only place in which one could at last become real! THOMAS MERTON

Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were.  But without it we go nowhere. CARL SAGAN

To live is the rarest thing in the world.  Most people exist, that is all. OSCAR WILDE

Logic will get you from A to B.  Imagination will take you everywhere. ALBERT EINSTEIN

The universe is transformation; our life is what our thoughts make it. MARCUS AURELIUS

To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead. BERTRAND RUSSELL

the actual adolescents’ changing moods puzzle them as much as they puzzle their families

The Cancer Love Mystery

The child is now an Adolescent, the soul having evolved to the stage of Cancer, hovering between childhood and maturity, longing to be grown-up, yet hesitating to cross over to the other side.  Cancer brings back awareness of the negative feminine and reflective Night Forces.  But this second experience of night is blended with a new, richer and even more sensual feeling (which was only a poetic inspiration, not yet a true reality, on the earlier Taurean level), for a change of seasons has occurred.   The spring awakening has deepened into a mid-summer night’s dream in all its full-blown and fragrant beauty for these Cancerian Oberon and Titania men and women.

Now the moody, sensitive, “Adolescent” soul vacillates between childish dependence and the maddeningly enticing, beckoning world of adulthood (what is like to be a man or a woman?).  This is beautifully expressed by the experiments between the human and faerie worlds in Taurean Shakespeare’s famed classic.  Is it sad or happy…funny or tragic?  The symbolic “Puckish” Cancerian Adolescent observes the adults (humans) in the environment, uncannily perceptive of everything seen and heard.  But this grown-up, material world so intensely watched hints of frequent disillusion.

And so the dreams of Cancer are troubled, causing the Crab to cry out in the night, sometimes dragging the old symbolic Taurus Teddy Bear out of the closet, and hugging it closely when no one can see.  As with Cancerian men and women, the actual adolescents’ changing moods puzzle them as much as they puzzle their families.  But those terrors are very real to Cancerians, who fear that maturity will mean the loss of security known with the parents, especially the mother.  Will future strangers ever fuss over the Crabs and love them as unconditionally as mother?  Cancer is beginning to suspect that they won’t.

Unable to explain their apprehensions, the Crabs turn secretive, dreaming alone – or hide and pout, imagining that no one understands.  On the Cancer level, the possible loss of parental protection haunts the subconscious.  Cancer has already learned what loss is.  Perhaps childhood friends have moved away, the family has changed residences, the old familiar neighbourhood is gone.  The world is no longer so exciting as the Crabs sense its hidden pitfalls.  The “Adolescent” Cancerian men and women know that growing up will surely bring unexpected hurt, so they cling to what they know can be trusted – yesterday.

Because the new perceptions are so acute, Cancer sees a combination of tragedy and comedy in Life as it expands in his awareness through his first excursion into the sensitive Water Element.  Still, despite an innate shyness, the Cancerian soul will not be pushed into the background, for this is the second experience as a Cardinal leader, which can turn illogical fear into sensible caution.  The Crabs wish on both the Full Moon and the New, only half-conscious of what it is they wish for……reluctant t find out.  What does tomorrow hold?  Sentiment moves the Cancerian Adolescent soul to tears.  Motivated by the need to hide true emotions, the Crabs say: “I FEEL” – then, so no one will suspect they feel so deeply, they make jokes, believing they fool people.  If not handled tenderly at this crucial stage of soul evolvement, the Cancerian man or woman develops a permanent, hard, protective shell against the cruel world.

Cancer’s positive qualities are imagination, tenacity, tenderness, sensitivity, care and caution.  Expressed in their negative form they become stinginess, irritability, melancholy, clinging and cowardice, possessiveness and moodiness.

To Cancer, as to the actual uncertain and sentimental adolescent, love has become important again, above all else.  But it is now synonymous with home, representing emotional security – and the need for love is so great it must be disguised behind moody tears and Lunar laughter.

Source: http://vi.sualize.us/view/ae0dcd051ae6493b3b85fe34edc699f4/

Source:

http://www.tumblr.com/dashboard

A Dark Horse

I have done this analysis before.  Once I walked in an Art Shop and met a nice young man by the name William who actually had read “Crime and Punishment” by Dostoevsky.  We had a heated discussion and I said that I was not quite sure that foreigners were even close to understanding Dostoevsky because of the way he wrote.  Something must be lost in translation.  William did agree, and expressed that “colour yellow” was lost in translation.  The discussion was not limited to “Crime and Punishment”, Dostoevsky, literature or colours for that matter.  At the time I was very much interested in the Personality Dimensions of Blue – Orange – Green – Gold variety and suggested that we find out William’s colours.  He said that he would be willing to do that only if I agreed to do go through the Cube Personality Test.  I don’t remember his colours, but I remember this story.

And I remember vividly my own results of the Cube Personality Test.  Do you know why William was so adamant about the Cube Personality Test?  He thought I was “so full of myself”.  He couldn’t be more wrong.

The questions he asked me were not exactly the same as I found just recently on the Internet, but I will try to tell the story as accurately as I possibly can.

First of all, there was no white room.  He asked me to imagine a scene and myself in it.  So I imagined myself on the ocean shore, walking on the beach, feet in the water, eyes looking down at my feet, occasionally looking up at the scenery, green and mountainous, beautiful beyond imagination.

Source: http://www.allposters.com/-sp/Salt-Cay-Turks-and-Caicos-Islands-Posters_i3689447_.htm

Cube.

I don’t remember whether he suggested that I should imagine a WHITE cube.  But I did.  It was far away in the ocean, fairly small in size.  So, I was not “full of myself” at all, far from it and my ego was smaller in 2008, than it is now in 2010.  But it is true, I have learned a lot from my experiences in these two years and I gained some confidence.  The fact that the cube was white…  Either it was according to his suggestion, or I did not hide from others who I was at that moment.

Flowers.

There were no flowers in his scenario.

Ladder.

Ladder was also white, fairly small in size, floating in the water, obviously in a horizontal position.  No interpretation needed.  No goals, no aspiration, no ambition.  Or all of it was in a slumber state.

Source: http://thumb18.shutterstock.com.edgesuite.net/photos/display_pic_with_logo/182188/182188,1242375239,1.jpg

By the way, it is not what I imagined, but when I was looking for an  image, I could not resist.  I so do love spirals and twists!

Horse.

He asked for the colour of the horse.  I had trouble picking between black and white.  I chose black in the end.  The horse was running towards me.  I don’t know why I was so perplexed with the horse images and still I remember mostly this horse.  In Russian, we have an expression “a dark horse”, meaning somebody with fairly inconspicuous looks who turns out to be a winner quite unexpectedly.  I guess it is the same in English.  If that horse is running towards me and I haven’t seen it yet, it probably means, that the horse has quite a journey.  I am still curious.  Really!

Source: http://www.blessedbylife.com/images/blackhorsebeach.jpg

That is my horse precisely, my dream has been photographed.

Rainstorm.

Rainstorm is far in the ocean, but the sky is darkening and the storm is quite serious.

Source: http://www.roadsideoregon.com/?cat=3

I don’t know about you, but I had fun doing this test.  I love imagery and it is quite memorable.  Now it is time to go back to my challenges (opportunities)!

By the way, I just decided to test my parents.  It was so much fun.  My mom’s ego is red and bigger than mine, my dad’s ego is BLACK (help! what does that mean?) and the same size as mine.  Really, you should try it!

The only reason I have copied this test is that I want to keep this information.  Web-sites change, appear and disappear.  I did not create this test, so I give you the source of information and I hope you enjoy that web-site.

Source: http://www.personality-and-aptitude-career-tests.com/cube-personality-test.html

11 Questions to Discover Your Hidden Personality Areas Within 90 Seconds!

The Cube personality test is a quick mental exercise that lasts approximately 90 seconds, and can be used to tell a great deal about a person, by asking them to imagine a situation. The Cube personality test requires a working imagination, but most people can successfully complete the test. When the test is given, the person taking the test must respond to each question as quickly as possible, saying the first things that they think of. You can easily use the Cube personality test as a party trick, or to get to know your friends or spouse easier. This article contains the Cube personality test, as well as what the responses to the questions on the test means.

The Test

Picture an enormous white room. In this room, there is a cube.

1.) What color is the cube?

2.) What size is the cube?

3.) Where is it located in the room? Is it floating, or on the ground?

Next, imagine flowers inside of this room.

4.) Where are the flowers located?

5.) How large are the flowers?

Next, imagine a ladder inside of the white room.

6.) Where is the ladder?

7.) What size is the ladder?

Next, imagine a horse in the white room.

8.) Where is the horse?

9.) Name three personality characteristics of the horse (mean, funny, sad, happy, etc).

Lastly, imagine a rainstorm inside the white room.

10.) Where is the rainstorm located?

11.) How large is the rainstorm?

Interpretation of the Answers

Once you have asked someone these questions, be sure to make a mental note of their answers. You can now easily use the answers that they gave, to reveal a great amount about their personality. The white room represents our lives. Inside of this white room, there is a cube. This cube is a representation of our ego, or how we see ourselves. If your cube is small, it means that you have a small ego, you are humble. If your ego is large, it means that you might be “full of yourself”. A colored ego means that you hide who you really are from people. A white or clear cube means that you do not put a show on for others. If the cube is on the ground, it means that you are well grounded in your views, and “down to earth”. If the cube is floating, it means that your life is unstable and unpredictable.

The flowers in the room represent your family and friends. If there are a lot of flowers in the room, it means that you prefer to be surrounded by friends and family. If the flowers are only a few, it means that you prefer only a few close friends. If your flowers are near the cube, it means that you are close to your friends. If your flowers are further away, you prefer to keep a distance between your friends.

The ladder inside the room represents your life’s goals and ambition. A small ladder means that you do not have any goals, or that your goals in life are small. If your ladder is large, it means that your goals and expectations for yourself are set higher than average. If your ladder is far away from your cube, it means that right now you are not working on your goals. If your ladder is on top of your cube, it means that your goals and ambitions are controlling you.

The horse inside of the room is your spouse. The three characteristics of the horse apply to your spouse, or what you like to see in your spouse. If your horse is close to the cube, it means that you are close to your spouse. When you see a beautiful horse it shows your beautiful experience with your spouse.

The rainstorm inside of the room is life’s problems. If your thunderstorm is large, it means that your life is hectic. If the thunderstorm is near another object (for instance, the horse), it means that that object is causing problems in your life. If you see small thunderstorm that means you are currently not facing too many difficulties or at least ignoring them.

While fun, the Cube personality test tells us a lot about each other, and helps us to understand each other. Although perhaps not the most accurate personality test (you will likely read objections from critics as to the accuracy of it), it still gives you a funny way to measure personality of another person. The Cube personality test has no known scientific origins, and has not been independently validated. Regardless, it is still a fun way to spend a few minutes with your friends, studying their responses.

Source: http://www.livbit.com/article/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/rubikscube_lamp2.jpg

If you are curious, you can read a couple of posts that will follow – I have done this Cube Personality Test twice.  Strangely enough, both times it was fairly accurate.

Source: http://www.jettobox.com/

Pontificating

Remembering is another form of suffering.  Remembering that success is a journey, not a destination, what shall I have in mind?  The past, the present, or the future?  Keep your eyes on the goals.  There have not been set yet.  That is the worst part – I don’t know what exactly I want, but I do continue my journey because I am still alive.  Or maybe I am still alive because I do continue my journey and my journey is my success.  I don’t feel successful.  I should imagine being successful.  What do I do in the meantime, yes, between pretending being successful and figuring out what success actually means for me?

I keep reading self-help books.  Most people say that I read all the wrong books, but let them say whatever they want.  This new book that I picked and put a lot of hope into is “Awaken the Giant Within” by Anthony Robbins.  I will be journaling my experiences from now on, because I have a feeling that there are some positive changes in my life.  A lot of setbacks, too, but…   But we shall judge life by the results, or not judge, or maybe judge, but not by results…  Let the journey continue…

“Deep within man dwell those slumbering powers; powers that would astonish him, that he never dreamed of possessing; forces that would revolutionize his life if aroused and put into action.”  (Orison Swett Marden)

 

“A consistent man believes in destiny, a capricious man in chance.”  (Benjamin Disraeli)

 

 

“Man is born to live and not to prepare to live.”  (Boris Pasternak)

 

 

“Man is not the creature of circumstances; circumstances are the creatures of men.”  (Benjamin Disraeli)

 

 

“Nothing can resist the human will that will stake even its existence on its stated purpose.”  (Benjamin Disraeli)

 

 

“Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth – that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves, too.”  (Johann Wolfgang Goethe)

 

 

“I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by a conscious endeavor.”  (Henry David Thoreau)

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.  ~Ambrose Redmoon

 

 

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.  ~Winston Churchill

 

 

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.  ~Mark Twain

 

 

People are made of flesh and blood and a miracle fibre called courage.  ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

 

 

Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.  ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca, Letters to Lucilius

 Source: http://dwhamby1.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/courage.jpg

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.  Except a creature be part coward it is not a compliment to say it is brave.  ~Mark Twain, Pudd’nhead Wilson’s Calendar, 1894

 

 

Cowardice, as distinguished from panic, is almost always simply a lack of ability to suspend the functioning of the imagination.  ~Ernest Hemingway, Men at War, 1942

 

 

The courage of life is often a less dramatic spectacle than the courage of a final moment; but it is no less a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy.  ~John F. Kennedy

 

 

There is no such thing as bravery; only degrees of fear.  ~John Wainwright

 

 

To him that waits all things reveal themselves, provided that he has the courage not to deny, in the darkness, what he has seen in the light.  ~Coventry Patmore

Calendar Wisdom.

I am trying to stick to the monthly assignments from the calendar.  In February, I have not done such a good job.  Even though, I was thinking about love, but I did not write so much about it.  But it certainly made me think.  I even picked a couple of books on dating.  I did not expect to find much in them, but surprisingly enough they opened my eyes.  I even started following the advice given in them.  I hope I will write about some of my experiences in the LOVE department or as we used to say in Russia “on the love front” (I guess, everything is a battle for us!)

But there is a new beginning.  AGAIN.  A new Chapter.  Calendar Chapters are months.  So there is a new month.  March’s theme is “New Thinking”.  The major idea is in order to get where you want or anywhere at all, from point “A” to point “not A”, you need at least to start moving.  Forward, one might assume.  Or backward.  Or in circles (I hope NOT!)  Well…

New Thinking.

Sometimes the challenge of moving forward isn’t simply seeing the path, it’s taking the first step.  And to move our thinking forward, we have to make mental leaps into uncharted territory.  Pick your favorite word in the first line of a poem, using it from the tiles.  Each day use this word in the first line of a poem, using it as differently as possible each day: as a noun, a verb, an adjective, as something good, something bad, as something personal, as something public.  Stretch your imagination and see where one word can take you.

Quote of the month:

“Every child is an artist.  The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.”

 - Pablo Picasso

So… I am picking the word “SUCCESS”

Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.

It is a Saturday, a sunny and cold day in Toronto.  In 1993, February 6^th was a Saturday, it was sunny in the morning and cold, the roads were slippery (talk about signs!!!), but then it warmed up enough for a real snow storm in the night.

So, today is my wedding anniversary with my first husband to whom I am no longer married.  I am not divorced from him either.  The divorce is still in the process…

I often wonder when the break up really happened and who broke what… and honestly I don’t know.  The saddest part is that I still care.  The best part is… well, the best part remains to be discovered.

Another chapter in my journey.  As much as I am unable to do anything these days or write anything, I could not miss this day.  I should make a post.  And, surprisingly enough it turns out to be the post # 342 (here it comes again, my number 42).  Madness?  Eccentricity? 

“Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Remarriage is the triumph of hope over experience…”

 

“The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henny Youngman.

 

 

“I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late.”

 

 

“I think weddings are sadder than funerals, because they remind you of your own wedding. You can’t be reminded of your own funeral because it hasn’t happened. But weddings always make me cry.” – Brendan Behan (1923-64) Irish playwright.

 

 

“Three rings of marriage: The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.”

 

 

“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” – George Burns.

 

 

“Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.” – Bertrand Russell (1872-1970), British philosopher, Marriage and Morals.

 

 

“Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.” – Jim Backus.

 

 

“By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates.

 

 

“The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing — and then marry him.” –Cher