Source: http://www.thelifechangeexperiment.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/decision-making-processes1.jpg

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing” (Helen Keller)

Remembering the art of reframing  -  life is not a struggle, but an adventure.  So, forget about nothing, it is too much of an abstract idea.  Life cannot be nothing, but we can perceive it differently.  “Get a life!” say some.  It is, of course, not only rude, but also absurd.  All of us are alive; the question is what to do with those lives.  That is a matter of choice.  When we make choices, we make decisions and control our lives to a certain degree.  Correction.  Not to a certain degree, we are in total control, yet most of the time completely unaware of it.  I am trying to change my view on how to make decisions.  There is one post I made on making decisions,

http://www.altrealm.com/english/chapters/2009-07-26/jvs-wise-10-steps-in-decision-making/

But when I compared it with the strategy suggested by Anthony Robbins, I see that he is more relaxed about choices.  The most important part is to reach the destination, the route is less crucial.  Besides, we cannot possibly know all the outcomes of all the alternatives.  So we make decisions based on the information we have, which is always insufficient, inaccurate and “a subject to change without notice.”

Harness the Power of Making Decision

Anthony Robbins “Awaken the Giant Within”, Chapter 2, page  48

Remember the true power of making decisions.

It’s a tool you can use in any moment to change your entire life.  The minute you make a new decision, you set in motion a new cause, effect, direction, and destination for your life.  You literally begin to change your life the moment you make a new decision.  Remember that when you start feeling overwhelmed, or when you feel like you don’t have a choice, or when you feel like you don’t have a choice, or when things are happening “to” you, you can change it all if you just stop and decide to do so.  Remember, a real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken new action.  If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.

Realize that the hardest step in achieving anything is making a true commitment – a true decision.

Carrying out your commitment is often much easier than the decision itself, so make your decisions intelligently, but make them quickly.  Don’t labor forever over the question of how or if you can do it.  Studies have shown that the most successful people make decisions rapidly because they are clear on their values and what they really want for their lives.  The same studies show that they are slow to change their decisions, if at all.  On the other hand, people who fail usually make decisions slowly and change their minds quickly, always bouncing back and forth.  Just decide!

Realize that decision-making is a kind of act in itself, so a good definition for a decision might be “information acted upon”.  You know you’ve truly made a decision when action flows from it.  It becomes a cause set in motion.  Often the effect of making a decision helps create the attainment of a larger goal.  A critical rule I’ve made for myself is never to leave the scene of a decision without first taking a specific action toward its realization.

Make decisions often

The more decisions you make, the better you’re going to become at making them.  Muscles get stronger with use, and so it is with your decision-making muscles.  Unleash your power right now by making some decisions you’ve been putting off.  You won’t believe the energy and excitement it will create in your life!

Learn from your decisions.

There’s no way around it.  At times, you’re going to screw up, no matter what you do.  And when the inevitable happens, instead of beating yourself into the ground, learn something.  Ask yourself, “What’s good about this?  What can I learn from this?”  This “failure” may be an unbelievable gift in disguise if you use it to make better decisions in the future.  Rather than focus on the short-term setback, choose instead to learn lessons that can save you time, money, or pain, and that will give you the ability to succeed in the future.

Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.

Once you’ve decided who you want to be as a person, for example, don’t get stuck on the means to achieving it.  It’s the end you’re after.  Too often, in deciding what they want for their lives, people pick the best way they know at the time – they make a map – but then don’t stay open to alternate routes.  Don’t become rigid in your approach.  Cultivate the art of flexibility.

Enjoy making decisions.

You must know that in any moment a decision you make can change the course of your life forever: the very next person you stand behind in line or sit next to on an airplane, the book you read or page you turn could be the one single thing that causes the floodgates to open, and all of the things that you’ve been waiting for to fall into place.

If you really want your life to be passionate, you need to live with this attitude of expectancy.

[…]

Know that it’s your decisions, and not your conditions, that determine your destiny.  Before we learn the technology for changing how you think and how you feel every day of your life, I want you remember that, in the final analysis, everything you’ve read in this book is worthless… every other book you’ve read or tape you’ve heard or seminar you’ve attended is worthless…unless you decide to use it.  Remember that a truly committed decision is the force that changes your life.  It’s a power available to you in any moment if you decide to use it.

Prove to yourself that you’ve decided now.  Make one or two decisions that you’ve been putting off: one easy decision and one that’s a bit more difficult.  Show yourself what you can do.  Right now, stop.  Make at least one clear-cut decision that you’ve been putting off – take the first action toward fulfilling it – and stick to it!  By doing this, you’ll be building that muscle that will give you the will to change your entire life.

You and I both know that there are going to be challenges in your future.  But […] if you’ve decided to get past the walls, you can climb over them, you can break through them, you can tunnel under them, or you can find a door.  No matter how long a wall has stood, none has the power to withstand the continued force of human beings who have decided to persist until it has fallen.  The human spirit truly is unconquerable.  But the will to win, the will to succeed, to shape’s one life, to take control, can only be harnessed when you decide what you want, and believe that no challenge, no problem, no obstacle can keep you from it.  When you decide that your life will ultimately be shaped not by conditions, but by your decisions, then in that moment, your life will change forever, and you will be empowered to take control…

Discourse

When I talk about definitions, I think it is important.  For me, at least.

A discourse – a conversation, talk. (apart from other meanings).

Origin: Latin dis – in different directions + currere – run.

An example?  Oh, my goodness!  I often listen to the songs on the www.youtube.com.  And how many times I had encountered absolutely insane conversations!  Most of the time I just don’t even pay attention to what is there.  But once I was asked whether I am aware of the discussions under the clips.  Then I sort of started paying attention.

I picked a clip teaching beginners’ steps for Salsa.  And a discourse jewel on top.  Here it is – a priceless example of meanness and creativity.  And one of the participants had a good point, when he mentioned the importance of definitions.

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Participant 1:

Following your line of thinking, Spanish is actually a retarded deformation of Latin and Arabic.

Notwithstanding the fact that you are unaware of the definition of the words:

1) retarded

2) language

3) dialect

the fact remains that you are neither intelligent, nor insightful, nor useful as a human being. I hereby order you, in the name of the survival of the species, to cease existing immediately.

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I was just wondering what drives those conversations.  Some people would say anger.  But I am beginning to think that it is pure loneliness.  Maybe both.

Quotes on Discourse:

1. “All discourses but my own afflict me; they seem harsh, impertinent, and irksome”

(Ben Jonson)

 

2. “Of our thinking it is but the upper surface that we shape into articulate thought; underneath the region of argument and conscious discourse lies the region of meditation.”

(Thomas Carlyle)

 

3. “It’s our tendency to approach every problem as if it were a fight between two sides. We see it in headlines that are always using metaphors for war. It’s a general atmosphere of animosity and contention that has taken over our public discourse.”

(Deborah Tannen)

4. “The only privilege literature deserves – and this privilege it requires in order to exist – is the privilege of being in the arena of discourse, the place where the struggle of our languages can be acted out.”

(Salman Rushdie)

 

5. “Discourse may want an animated “No”

 

To brush the surface, and to make it flow;

 

But still remember, if you mean to please,

 

To press your point with modesty and ease.”

(William Cowper)

 

6. “The failures of the press have contributed immensely to the emergence of a talk-show nation, in which public discourse is reduced to ranting and raving and posturing.”

(Carl Bernstein)